clearskies, bluewater

Insights, reflections and creative imaginings for our awakening world

Washed, wrung out and hung up to dry

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This is the third try for writing a blog in so many days. There has been something about the energy swirling about the world and collective consciousness that has prevented me from writing this week. Third time’s the charm, as they say…

I have a small sign up on my board above the computer and desk which says, “When in doubt, Apply Faith.” This reminder has proven valuable again and again during these last months, and this week has been no exception. By now I am beyond doubting myself, my life or my purpose; all of that belongs to the past, and a year ago was my ‘dark night of the soul’ time, which thankfully is over. The present is clearly about being a person who bears the light across the world each day, holds it in the middle of the dark night, and shines it for others so they can also see more light than darkness in the world. It feels right and good to finally be certain of my purpose in life, after so many years of questioning and wondering and wandering around in search of something elusive and uncertain.

Having said that, I also have to say it has been a helluva bumpy ride these past days in the human relations department of life. Bumping into others’ egos almost daily, certainly each time I am around other people in any meaningful way. Which then holds the mirror up to my own ego– I too am a struggling human, after all. I am becoming adept at catching my own ego in action, the moment when I see myself thinking, ‘but of course I am right about this!” It is a trickster, one’s ego, so good at appearing to be innocent and utterly blameless.

And yet. It does seem to be getting clearer and easier for me to notice when someone is in judgement mode, and how truly dysfunctional that way of thinking is to all concerned. When I have seen it lately it feels like a big wall is instantly built between myself and them, or if they are speaking about another, then the wall appears between them and the other person. This wall is brick, high and thick, like a kind of fortress. It cuts off the possibilities for communication between people, for understanding and any kind of agreements to happen. That is what walls do; protect the one on the inside, and keep out all others on the other side. So how can we build doors into these walls we surround ourselves with, so that there can be a way to invite the other in, to sit down and have a cup of tea, and talk it over, and try to make friends with them? Isn’t that after all the point of all of this, to make friends with the rest of the world? Aren’t we finally over the time of humanity needing walls, barriers, to keep ‘the other’ out and away from us? Isn’t it really time by now for knocking down useless walls of judgement and replacing them with gardens, with trees and flowers and vegetables and fruits, with openings to invite others to come in and see all the good we have created, are daily creating in our little section of the world, and then go over to their garden and see what they have been growing and appreciate it in turn?

Dear Readers, I am sure that you are well aware that this is not an easy process, this learning how to drop our judgements and become open instead to possibilities and other points of view. It is hard, often tedious work. And it is of maximum importance now in the world. If we cannot be open and listen to each other, in order to really hear what another person is saying, regardless of whether we agree with them or not, if we cannot do this within our own families, work places, friendships, then how can we possibly expect for the world to change for the better, and become the future world in which we really want to live? There really is no freedom in judgement. No flexibility. No softening. No opening. No evolution.

Some of the good advice I have read in the past week on my favorite blogs include “Love, trust and forgive one another,” and ‘Relax, release the mind, be neutral and breathe.” Be neutral and breathe, what splendid advice! Obviously it is not possible to be neutral all the time, and I certainly do believe in feeling passionately about things in life. Yet, taking a neutral stance in tricky situations can be a huge help when others are taking up symbolic arms against one another. The mediators are important in the scheme of human relations, maybe more important than ever. I can do this for you when you cannot be impartial, and when I cannot, then please be my mediator!

So much keeps falling to the wayside these days, have you noticed? So many small details quickly lose their significance, a thread which was life and death important one day can be just as easily lose its importance the next (or at least within days), in a real way it is amazing that we can all keep getting up in the mornings and remember what happened yesterday, let alone why it was important. The river of our collective lives is flowing swifter and ever swifter, gaining momentum and winding its way along to the great mouth of the ocean of consciousness where we are all headed. No one is immune to this river, we are all swept along in it by now. We are becoming, out of necessity, better and more agile swimmers.

This past week here in Sjælland, Denmark, has been very changeable. It began with rain and clouds, moving mid-week into strong winds and sun, and finally last night we had our first frost. Today was clear and beautifully bright, the air sharp with the fullness of October. It was a lovely day, I spent a lot of it outside with the school on an outing to some forest within walking distance. As I walked along, observing the Danish countryside with its fall colors and high crisp air, I felt real clarity inside of me, for a brief glimpse of life in its complex simplicity, its glorious profusion, its wide open skies and fresh winds. Of course, it didn’t last the afternoon, once I sat down to a long and emotional email from one of my daughters. Then I was once again caught in the web of drama and events which makes up my life story, along with all of its emotional entanglements. That’s okay, because I did have that hour or two of another reality to counter what came later on. These days, it seems that is perhaps the best I can do.

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Author: SingingBones

When we sing over the bones, we are calling the wild nature, the instinctive soul back, singing it alive again. To live with our wildness intact, is the greatest gift a woman can give herself. "It is the holy poetry and singing we are after." C.P. Estes

8 thoughts on “Washed, wrung out and hung up to dry

  1. EVEN MOMENTS OF CLARITY CAN BE CELEBRATED, MY LOVE….AND YOU ARE HAVING MORE AND MORE OF THOSE…the walls of judgment are very common…I do it….you do it…..let’s forgive ourselves and be ever vigilant so they don’t pop us so often!

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    • Thank you for your thoughts, Dr. Banner…. yes the walls of judgement, may they come tumbling down more and more, like the walls of Jericho once did… the Berlin Wall did, and may we keep planting seeds for the beautiful gardens which will grow in their stead.

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  2. thank you for your insightful sharing

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  3. It’s so hard to be impartial about matters of the heart, isn’t it, and especially matters involving your own children, even when they’re old enough to be on their own and making their own choices. I’m glad you had that interlude of a sense of the larger reality back of it all, before reengaging with the more “personal” parts of life’s drama. More and more I’m convinced there’s not a “right” way that things should turn out — there’s only what’s with me on the path right now, and how I choose to handle it. And that’s true for each person’s life. It can be hard not to judge how someone else’s life is going, just as it’s hard not to judge myself. But when I can succeed, it leaves space for things to be, to shift, to breathe, to fall away…

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  4. I hear ya SB….It has been a rough go as of late…One test after another to get past but boy the journey sure is exhilarating! We are creeping ever closer to Dec 2012 and you can feel the momentum picking up quickly! I hope you are enjoying your fall over there. Stay in your heart and breathe deeply….We are almost to the finish line! Blessings…VK

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    • Thanks, VK. My latest post tonight is inspired by one of your recent posts…. so thanks for the inspiration! Blessings back to you from Denmark tonight…. SB

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